The Death of Morality- Are You a Contributor?

I am saddened more and more everyday to see the decline in spiritual morality. As Christians, we should be standing AGAINST the sin the world offers, not FOR it. Scripture clearly tell us to “Abstain from all appearance of evil.” We are ALL sinners. But as Christians, we are saved, and forgiven. This doesn’t mean that we stop sinning- but it SHOULD mean that we try harder not to. The word abstain is a verb, which conveys an action, an occurrence, or a state of being. And it means : to refrain deliberately and often with an effort of self-denial from an action or practice <abstain from drinking> . The fact that “self-denial” is mentioned in the definition clearly implies that whatever sin we abstain from can be pleasurable. What sin would be tempting were it not pleasurable? I mean come on, the devil isn’t stupid! The definition also uses the word “often”. Sin is very tempting and we will be faced with it time after time after time after…well you get it. But the Lord knows the definition of the word abstain. He created it. And He wouldn’t have put it in His word unless He meant it. He wants us to “constantly, on purpose, deprive ourselves, deny ourselves from sin.”  Hebrews 11: 25 says” Choosing rather to suffer affliction with the people of God, than to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a season;”  

  Is lust wrong? Fornication?  Why do we brag publically when we watch a movie about male strippers? Why do we brag about partying and getting drunk??  What about bitterness, anger, wrath? Let the past go. Forgive. Stop talking about it, forget it, whatever “it” might be.  People mess up, so do you. We are no better, no holier than the next person. When we hang onto problems and continually talk about them with others (GOSSIP), we are allowing the problem to become deeply rooted in our hearts, thus causing a separation between ourselves and God. Jealousy? A huge problem that puts wedges between Christians. Love each other with godly love! Agree to disagree! Realize that we are ALL human, and each of us have different thorns, different srtongholds and sins that we struggle with. Again, we all sin. But as born-again believers, we should be striving daily to combat the sin. Don’t give it in to it voluntarily, fight it. Pray against it- the Lord will give you strength to overcome. Instead, so many Christians are bragging publically about their sins, helping to send our society into an even deeper moral plunge. I’m so saddened by the fact that so many Christians are advertising their pleasure in sin to a lost and dying world. Don’t you know that Jesus is coming SOON?  Don’t speak out against places and people who are trying their best to stand for good moral biblical principles- we don’t want to come across as holier than thou. LOVINGLY stand for what  is right. Even if you have points you disagree with, isn’t something biblical and spiritual better than NOTHING at all? We are running out of time to reach these people. Our testimony may be the one thing that reaches them. Who cares about your past? God says that “As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.” He also says He remembers them no more. Don’t live on mistakes you’ve made in the past. Forget the past, just like Christ has. But don’t misunderstand – just because Christ “remembers them no more” doesn’t mean that we will not suffer the consequences of the sin. The marks of sin will stay with us, but we can strive TODAY to do more, and be more for the cause of Christ. Ask yourself this: “Are my actions, and what I do each day edifying  to the body of Christ and pleasing to the Lord?” In others words, are my actions making the Lord proud of me, and is our daily testimony encouraging to another Christian? If the answer to anything you do is No, this is NOT edifying or pleasing to the Lord, then stop. Plain and simple. And when you DO mess up, willingly sin, continue in your sin, please don’t advertise it. You are doing so much damage by doing so. People are watching you. Lost people, saved people. They see how you behave as a Christian, and your walk affects others whether you realize it or not. I pray that we will be bold, have courage, and take a stand for all things holy, and against all things contrary to holiness. I also pray that this convicts a heart that has gotten slack in the endeavor to win souls to Christ, and “that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.”

 1 Peter 2:11 Dearly beloved, I beseech you as strangers and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts, which war against the soul;

Salvation- I'm not "good enough" to keep mine

Some days, my mind just gets the best of me. I wake up grumpy, and just feeling plain ol' unloveable. And everyone around me knows it- because I make them feel unloveable as well. My mind is filled with all sorts of negative thoughts, whether it be about bills, school problems, or simply put, people problems. It's days like that, that I feel very unworthy of God's love. Let alone His salvation, His security, His favor.

I remember as a child, my mom scolding me for lying to her. Don't ask for specifics, because that happened too often for me to recall! But I also remember at night, my mom letting me lay on her lap as we watched t.v. I may have gotten scolded earlier in the day by her, but as she plays with my hair and tenderly caresses it with her fingers, I feel nothing but love. No anger, no judgement, no "re-hashing" the past, just love from my mom. No matter what I did, mama always forgave me. Sometimes forgiveness came after harsh punishment-sometimes, either by forgetfulness or mercy, either of which I'm grateful for, there was no punishment at all. But always was the look of disappointment or hurt on her face when I did wrong.

Anyone that knows me, which is a LOT since I still live in the very town I grew up in, knows that I have made a lot of mistakes. Some would be shocked to know that I have been saved since the age of 9. I lived in a home where church was "on-again off-again". Pretty much as I became a teen, church became a thing of the past. There was really no spiritual guidance or consistency which in turn led to a weak, ill-educated young adult christian. In my mind, I never really thought much about my salvation. I knew that I had trusted Jesus Christ as my Savior, but that was about the extent of it. Only until I became well into my twenties, did the realization strike me of what my salvation really meant. I had not lived a very pleasing life during my teen or early adult years. I was full of anger and animosity over life situations that had happened to me over the course of the years, and seemed intent on ruining my life. I may not recall the very moment of this realization, where I was, or what I was doing, but I remember a thought hittting me like a ton of bricks to the jaw: "Jesus has been with me all this time-I have taken Him with me to all the bad places,He has heard all the horrible things I have said,watched me almost destroy my life time and again." But the thought didn't stop there. It was like a python wrapping itself around me, squeezing tighter and tighter. So tight that I could barely breathe, as I realized the grief that I had put my Savior through for years of my life.
 I have never doubted that God's grace was sufficient. That I've always known. But what I did start to doubt was, "If I have been saved all this time, why would I live a life like I did? Why wouldn't God stop me? Did I really get saved?" This question began to quietly torture me. At this point in the story, I realized the error of my ways and I changed my life. I was no longer living an unpleasing life, but this nagging doubt was in the back of my mind always.

 I'm convinced that the Lord put 2 verses in the Bible specifically for me.

1. 2 Timothy 2:20
   But in a great house there are not only vessels of gold and of silver, but also of wood and of earth; and some to honour, and some to dishonour.
2. 2 Timothy 2:21
   If a man therefore purge himself from these, he shall be a vessel unto honour, sanctified, and meet for the master's use, and prepared unto every good work.

I was a vessel of dishonor. How shameful! Dishonor is never a good thing, no matter who or what it applies to. But since I am a vessel made by GOD, then my dishonor is directed at Him. I have dishonored Him, the One Who made me. But....and this a but with a capital B...I am still a vessel. Wow, what a thought-a life altering thought. The second verse up there says that even a vessel of dishonor CAN become a vessel of honor. Thats hope!! This thought changed my life. Talk about mercy....never has any one person been shown so much mercy as a child of God who has become such a vessel of dishonor that one would never recognise them as a christian. I'm so thankful that my Potter never took this lump of clay and destroyed it when it became ugly and marred. He just started over again, and began to remold, reshape, until I started to resemble the shape that He desired. Only He knows how many times He has had to reshape me, because only He knows how weak I am, and how many times I become marred. He never tires though....He's the Master Potter. Full of patience and love for His vessels.

In case anyone should ask about my earlier statement- the one about never doubting that I was saved...about how I always knew His grace was sufficient- Epesians 2:8-9 is very clear.  For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:
⁹ Not of works, lest any man should boast.

I know you've heard of the term "Indian-giver"...I don't mean to be offensive and I'm trying to be derrogatory at all, but as a child this word was associated or given to someone who gave you something, but then took it back. My God gave me a gift. Eternal salvation. The verse clearly states that nothing I could do, none of my works aquired this salvation. It was a gift. From God. And he's not an "indian-giver". Once He gives me something, it's mine forever. The faith that I placed in Him allowed me to have this salvation, and His grace is what gave me that faith. I can't brag about my salvation, because truthfully, I've done nothing to deserve it. I can brag on God however, because He is the One that keeps my salvation, in spite of me.

John 10:27-29

²⁷ My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me:
²⁸ And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.
²⁹ My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father's hand.

I am thankful for His grace that saved me. I am thankful for His mercy that keeps me saved. He is the ultimate loving father- that will allow us to crawl up on His lap even after we've done wrong and still have the tears of remorse running down our face, the evidence of his chastisement still visable, and love us still.

Romans 8:38-39

³⁸ For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,
³⁹ Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

 He already has me seated in heavenly places :)
No, I'm not good enough to keep my salvation, that's why my God keeps it for me :)

Grief

Recently, a dear friend contacted me about her grief. I felt very inadequate in the answers I gave her, but tried to reassure her that I would be praying for her. Not coincidentally, the book I have been reading covered a section on grief this past week and I wanted to share, in hopes that it may help her or anyone else for that matter. It helped me, as I have very recently dealt with the deepest form of grief I have ever experienced with the loss of my precious grandmother.
The lady writing this book I am reading experienced the loss of her young sister, and so she knows very well of that which she writes. So I will jot down some excerpts from Lysa Terkheurst's book, "Becoming More Than a Good Bible Study Girl", and pray that God will help to heal someone else's hurt through these words.


"Sometimes when hurts and disappointments come, they cause a temporary panic that rises and falls in a mini-tidal wave. ...at times the hurt comes in the form of a loss that cuts into your heart so viciously it forever redefines who you are and how you think. It's what I call deep grief. The kind that strains against everything you've ever believed. So much so you wonder how the promises that seemed so real on those thin Bible pages yesterday could ever possibly stand up under the weight of your enormous sadness today.
I've already mentioned how I walked away from God at that time. That is how many people process loss. Disillusionment can break people. It's understandable really. We are told from an early age that God can do anything, and we've read the stories about Jesus helping people. But how do we process such beliefs in the face of loss? Any kind of loss hurts. Trying to come to grips with the fact that God could have prevented this grief but didn't is a bit like trying to catch the wind and turn it into something visible. It's an answer we could chase our whole lives and never get. And sometimes this chase just simply wears people out. They turn and walk away, whispering, "I tried, God, but You just didn't work for me.You hurt my feelings and I don't want anything to do with You anymore." I was asking the wrong question. I was asking why.  Why did this happen? Why didn't You stop this, God? Why were my prayers not answered? Why?
Asking why is perfectly normal. Asking why isn't unspiritual. However, if asking this question pushes us farther from God rather than drawing us closer to Him, it is the wrong question.
In most situations, nothing positive can come from whatever answer there might be to a why question. If God gave us His reason why, we would judge Him. And His reasons, from our limited perspective, would always fall short. That's because our flat human perceptions simply can't process God's multidimensional, eternal reasons. God describes it this way:
   For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD.
   For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. (Is. 55:8-9) We can't see the full scope of the situation like God can; therefore, we must acknowledge that His thoughts are more complete and that He is more capable of accurately discerning what is best in every circumstance. In the case of losing a loved one, love skews even the most rational parts of us. Our love for the person we lost would never allow God's reasons to make us feel any better or to understand any more fully. We would still feel as though God had made a terrible mistake.
So, if asking the why question doesn't offer hope, what will? The what question. In other words, Now that this has happened, what am I supposed to do with it? Good can come from any loss if we make the choice not to resist the birthing process required to bring this good to life.
Psalm 139:16 tells us every person has a certain number of days assigned to them: Thine eyes did see my substance, yet being unperfect; and in thy book all my members were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them.
It takes time. Even when you love God and believe His promises, Even when you know without a doubt that you will see your loved one again. Even when you know hope is still there. It takes time. It takes wading through an ocean of tears. It takes finding a possession of your loved one that you thought was lost and realizing that God did that just to comfort you. It takes discovering one day that the sun still shines. It takes being caught off guard when you catch yourself smiling, only to realize it's okay. It takes prayer. It takes making the decision to stop asking for answers and start asking for perspective. It takes telling people to please not avoid saying their name-you want to hear it, over and over and over again. Then one day you take off the blanket of deep grief. You fold it neatly and tuck it away. You no longer hate it or resist it. For underneath it wondrous things have happened. The why questions have been replaced with truths from God's Word. verses that stung to read at first have now become the very lifeline you cling to. God's presence has fallen softly upon you and helped you see that good can come and will come in you and through you.
Yes, in time things have happened. Wondrous things. Things that could have only come about because divine hope still intersects with our broken world. The secret is letting God's Word get into you to achieve the purpose He intends. Then you can lift up your despair, your doubts and questions, your feelings of being hurt by God. And with open hands held high, you let the wind blow them all away.
And, finally, you will see years stretching before you once again. Hope stretching before you again. New perspectives even when others hurt you again. And more honest conversations with God stretching before you again."

A Change of Pace-

I made a hard decision last week.... after months of stressful deliberation (and much prayer) of whether or not my life and calling allowed time and room for the dedication that it takes to be a teacher, I came to the conclusion that I will be ending my fulltime teaching career. My life as a mother and Pastor's wife has been a fulltime job in and of itself for the last 3 years. I love teaching. I love those children. I love the women I work with. But I love my family more. Our church has grown at a rate that has been hard to keep up with- what a blessing! My husband barely manages to spread himself just thin enough to meet everyones needs, while our children compete for our time in the evenings and on weekends. You can imagine, as a mother, struggling with the guilt of not giving enough time, energy, or attention to matters of the home. As a teacher, my students deserve 100%. And the staff is expected to give 100%. My other "careers" as I will call them, are my family, and our ministry. They also deserve 100%. But how can I give 100% all the time, when I am trying to give it to so many? I have found myself so emotionally and physically stressed that I dread the things that I once loved. I feel like I have robbed myself of my joy. I have spent time doing things that I love, instead of loving the things that God has called me to do. He called my husband into fulltime ministry. I have children, and since we have a very busy church life, I have to make a way to have time for both. I guess we could say that I am prioritizing. I know that what will feel like just a matter of days, my kids will be grown and gone. I have lost a grandmother who needed me everyday for her last months, but I couldn't /didn't devote to her the time she needed because I was already juggling 3 "jobs". As long as the Lord allows, I will step out on faith, and be here for my family first. I don't want to continue to give them my "leftovers". So, looking at all these things on my plate, I asked myself, which ones are the most important? Which one will allow time for the others if given up, and which one can be given up? My heart aches with the decision  I made. But I know that I made the right one. I will miss my job at BHS, but I look forward to being able to do my other "jobs" with joy, knowing that they have my undivided attention and devotion. I look forward to helping my husband as I've never helped him before. I look forward to what the future hold for our family. I look forward to being all that I can be to the people that God has brought to LBC. I wish that I would have had this time back in January. It breaks my heart everytime I hear my mawmaw's words to me, "Make time for me, they can wait." But I was too busy, pulled in so many directions. I'd give anything to have that time back. But...I must tell myself what some good friends have recently told me: "It's all in GOD'S time, not mine". I will have time to spend with my grand daddy, while I still have him. I will not continue to live my life in a blur of fast forward days, barely having time to blink. Life is short enough as it is. I will slow down, and enjoy what God has given me. My family, my church, my health. Make time for your family! Even if it means sacrafice, it's worth it! After all, no one has forever here. We're all on borrowed time :)
 I will end with one of my favorite songs. Just as the song says, I will "leave it all behind...I am full of love beyond measure, my joy is going to flow like a stream in the desert."

The Mentor of a Lifetime

Who can measure your worth?
 Not a soul, not here on earth.

You were so much more than grandmother,
Gentle, kind, and loving like no other.

My mind is crowded with memories near and dear,
 Ones we made, year after year.

Camping trips to the beach, with all of us in tow- Your vacations weren't to "get away"-
No, you wanted us all to go.

Walking on the pier, barefoot and sun-kissed
Precious memories that will always exist.

You loved my children, the way you loved me
with that special "mawmaw love"- whole, and completely.

I'm so glad they were able to know you
 For women of your worth are rare and few.

You were such a great example, living what you taught
 from how to make biscuits,to living how we aught.

 You taught me that people change, and the past is the past
 You loved with your whole heart, and put yourself last.

 I never heard you murmur, never heard you complain,
only saw you get up everyday, and do it all again.

I'm sorry for the busyness, that kept me away from you-
 But I am extremely proud, that in me, you saw what God can do.

Because He took a spoiled, selfish girl that never gave, only took
 And turned me into a woman, that by the grace of God, that old lifestyle forsook.

 I am who I am because of Him, and because of your love
 that God so selflessly, through you, sent from above.

You are so precious in my sight, the greatest woman I ever knew
God was extra gracious, when He gave this world you.

 In loving memory of Shirley Moon Brooks Dec. 13,1934- April 12,2012

HE'S ALIVE!

~New Devo posted yesterday-See the Devotion Page~

I think we all jumped the gun a little on spring! Feels like it, anyway! But no matter the weather, come this Sunday morning, we will be celebrating the Resurrection of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ! I plan to be at Sunrise Service, even it means bundling up in a blanket, because this is the day that all of Christianity is based upon. We serve a RISEN Savior, one that DIED for us, but was RAISED incorruptible. There's a song about this....our own quartet sings it at church, that goes like this: I WALKED BY THE TOMB OF BUDDHA LOOKED INSIDE AND SAW HIS BONES, TRAVELED ON TO SEE MOHAMMAD STILL WRAPPED UP IN HIS GRAVE CLOTHES, THEN I JOURNEYED TO THE GARDEN , WHERE OLD JOSEPH LEFT HIM LAY, BUT THE PRECIOUS LAMB GOD'S ONLY BEGOTTEN HE WAS NO LONGER IN THE GRAVE IF YOU KNEW HIM LIKE I KNOW HIM, YOU WOULD KNOW THAT HE'S ALIVE, IF YOU FELT HIM LIKE I FEEL HIM, RESURRECTION DEEP INSIDE, YOU'D KNOW HE'S LIVING AND DEATH HAS DIED IF YOUR WONDERING IN THE DARKNESS COME AND STEP INTO THE LIGHT, NAILSCARRED HANDS REACH OUT TO HELP YOU, TO PULL YOU SAFE FROM DEATH TO LIGHT, FRIEND I TOO HAVE HAVE STOOD WHERE YOU STAND, COULD I TRUST IN THINGS I SEE, BUT JUST ONE STEP IN HIS DIRECTION THEN IN LOVE HE RAN TO ME IF YOU KNEW HIM LIKE I KNOW HIM, YOU WOULD KNOW THAT HE'S ALIVE, IF YOU FELT HIM LIKE I FEEL HIM RESURRECTION DEEP INSIDE, YOU'D KNOW HE'S LIVING AND DEATH HAS DIED YOU ASK ME HOW I KNOW HE'S LIVING HE LIVES WITHIN MY HEART IF YOU FELT HIM LIKE I FEEL HIM RESURRECTION DEEP INSIDE, YOU' KNOW HE LIVING AND DEATH HAS DIED. No other religion can claim that their Messiah was born of a virgin, died for their sins, and yet lives forevermore. Jesus is His name, God's only Begotten, Who left Heavens throne because His very own were in need of a Savior and He knew that no one else could do it. If you aren't sure what all of this means, I'd be glad to tell you. Email me, comment, whatever means you have of contacting me and I will tell you exactly what this means, and how you can have eternal life by trusting in Jesus Christ and the blood that He shed on an old wooden cross so that you and I could be forgiven, and accepted. John 3:16 Eph. 2:8-9

Make it a Priority!

I step out on the porch, look around and inhale deeply. Everything is a beautiful lime green, and the world smells like honeysuckle. No wonder it's my favorite time of year! One of my favorite things to do during the cool mornings is to take my coffee to the porch and listen to the birds sing, watch the squirrels play chase, and to think about the possibility that the new day holds. A fresh start, a new beginning. I can do ANYTHING during this time of planning, and accomplish all that I intend to do, because, well, because I haven't started any of it yet! And because the distractions of the day have not yet begun to invade my peace of mind. When I get out of that chair and put my coffee cup in the dishwasher and embark upon that first task, that's when the challenges start. The distractions invade, willpower diminishes, and of course the hours in the day just fade away. One phone call can set me back at least an hour! And goodness knows, it's NOT just one phone call a day I get. TGFT! (Thank God for texting)I have learned to text while stirring a pot of beans, loading the dishwasher, folding clothes, and while using the....oh. Never mind. Anyway, I run through the living room, grabbing things up that don't belong and tossing them into the rooms of the owners, dash into the bathrooms to swish the toilets and grab a load of laundry. Make up my bed since I was in too big of a hurry when I rolled out of bed to get to the coffee pot ( since its cheap and ANCIENT and drips at approximately 10 dpm (drips per minute) Now the kids need this, or that and of course, we don't have any on hand, so I have to run them down to the store, and by the time I get back, its time to fix lunch. Once lunch is over I have to clean the kitchen again, and whaddaya know. An hour and a half before hubby gets home and I haven't even laid anything out for supper. I'm TIRED already! All of this for me on the weekends, or during the summer, because I work during the week (as do most of you) and I don't get the luxury of getting all of my chores done early. Our "homelife" starts at 3:30, or 5 or 5:30. Later for some of us. It's hard to get everything done, and sometimes seems nearly impossible. Life is busy. So busy that weeks fly by like minutes, and months like a day. Most days I wonder how I can be of any help at all to my husband, or my children because I'm so stressed and zapped from my day at work and I go to bed at night feeling unaccomplished. I needed to do more, to be more. I pray and ask God to show me how I can be what He needs me to be in the midst of my crazy busy life. He always answers us. Sometimes in unexpected ways, with unexpected answers. Let's look at our spiritual life the same way. We get up, knowing the first thing we should do is read our bible, do our devotions, pray. But I really need that coffee, so I'll get that going first, you know...because of the whole 10 dpm thing, and since I'm here, I need to swap over that laundry real fast so it doesn't sour in the washer. Oh, I almost forgot,I need to throw some chicken in the slow cooker. Before you know it, it's 7:30, and if you don't get ready now,you're going to be late for work. Devotions will have to wait til this evening. Then you get home, and do I really even need to go there? We all know how evenings at home after work are. By the time your head hits the pillow, your eyes are already closed, and before you fall asleep, you mumble in your mind, "Dear Lord, thank You for a good day, and all your many blessings, in Jesus' Name, Amen." 1 day down. Like anything, the longer you go without doing something, the harder it gets to get back into the normal swing of things. When we neglect the Word, and prayer, it makes a noticeable difference in our lives. Our patience is shorter, moods are grumpy,the feeling of peacefulness isn't as obvious. We start to feel like the Lord is away on vacation, instead of right beside us, holding our hand. Feelings of jealousy or envy begin to creep in where before there was no room for them. We find ourselves making excuses instead of executing a plan. When it comes to our home lives, we make a list of things to do. On that list, we have chores. Normally, chores are a drudgery. BUT, chores get done. Prayer and bible reading should be on that list. We shouldn't look at it as a drudgery, but as something that not only needs to be done, but HAS to be done. Make it #1 on your chore list. Before long, it's not a chore. It's the best part, and the most important part of your day. All of a sudden, the Lord is back beside you (where He's always been, but your mind got so far away from Him, you couldn't see Him) and those thoughts that crept in have taken a hike. You're back on track because you figured out in your busy life that prioritizing is a MUST. In every aspect of life. Keeping a clean house includes prioritizing a list. Having meals planned out, grocery list done, everything in a daily, weekly, or monthly routine should be prioritized. Without this essential step, distractions take us away from the goal. The first and top,most important priority of every day should be, has GOT to be God. Face it, you will make time to get everything else done. It seems like time with God is the only compromise, so get that done first thing, then it's done, you feel great, refreshed, now start your day and get everything accomplished. If one things gets left out, at least it's not God. When God is part of your day, you truly can be Superwoman. Let's go back to the beginning: I sit on the porch with my cup of coffee, looking around at God's beautiful creations enjoying the cool morning air. My Bible lays on the table, still open from my morning devotion. I have spent time with God in prayer. I know it's getting late and I need to get the kids up, but this is my favorite part of the day! Just one more minute to breathe in the scent of honeysuckle vines, to reflect on God, and His goodness. Now, I'm ready. I get the slow cooker going, swap over that laundry, get the kids up, can't make up the bed, because dear hubby is still in it, but that's not important. It's just a bed, doesn't change anything if it doesn't get made! It's not at the top of my priority list ;)

The year of a Lifetime

November 6th, we embarked on the journey of a lifetime. "We" being a mission team sent out of Liberty Baptist Church. Our destination was Lighthouse Childrens Home in Tres Rios, Costa Rica. Our goal? To be a blessing to these people who give their lives to take in orphans in the 7th most dangerous city in the world. That's right, Tres Rios is not part of the tropical paradise one might imagine when you think of Costa Rica. But I can say that I wouldn't have traded this trip for the most elaborate, extravagant island getaway imaginable. On November 7th, I shared my 36th birthday with 10 of the most extraordinary people I have ever known, as well as the Lighthouse family. A birthday that I will remember and treasure forever!!

What this trip did for me, and the others that went with me can't be put into words. Words aren't enough. If you could feel my heart, now that'd be awesome. Because then you too could feel the love that we experienced from the children of LCH. You could then feel the blessings we got from sharing our testimonies, our talents, our love, and quite simply, our time. But you can't feel my heart. So you'll just have to trust me. God poured out so much love and tenderness on our lives while we were there, using these precious children like sandpaper to soften hearts that were battling with God's plan for our lives. What most of us came back with, we didn't go looking for. We went expecting blessings, but I don't think we were prepared for what the Lord was going to do. To put it simply, it was amazing. 11 of us went out as brothers and sisters in Christ, but came back united in a way that will never be forgotten. I love those people. My heart grew so very fond of them. The ladies I shared 7 nights with forever changed my heart. They opened my eyes to things that I had been pushing away for years. And my eyes were opened towards their dreams and goals. Our pasts so similar that we knew only God could have brought us together the way He did. Ms. Carloyn, Deborah, Rachel, and Teresa, I love you. And I am so honored to have been able to spend that time with you all. What we experienced together will echo in eternity. And to the men also: Mike, Brian, Jeremy, Stephen,Teddy, Bill, and of course, my husband (haha) I love yall! Seeing your desire to do something for God by helping in any way possible touched my heart. Men who put their jobs aside, their families aside, and their everyday comforts aside to serve the Lord. I can't tell you how much that week did for me. To this day, I miss being with all of you day in and day out. I feel like you all literally became my physical family, and I experienced what can't be described as anything but "homesickness" upon returning home.
The children there became family as well. We all fell in love with them and our household family members would have been increased by at least one had we been allowed to adopt on the spot. Then the problem would have been how to choose which ones we took. I hope with everything in me that I get to go back soon to see these beautiful little souls that captured my heart.
And also hope that all reading this will get teh chance one day to experience what we did. It will change the way you look at people, at everyday life. Your eyes will be opened to a new kind of thankfulness you've never expereinced before.

Back to school!

It's been a great summer! The kids had a wonderful vacation bible school, a fun time at jr.camp, families had their vacations, but NOW....it is time to go back to school. That means myself as well since I'm a first grade teacher. I have another wonderful class this year, although a much larger class than last year, so I am very excited and looking forward to making great memories with the2011- 2012 first grade class!
The hard part as always is going to be getting back into that groove, and figuring out how to manage my family time as wisely as possible. Any preachers wife that works knows what I mean. Usually, 3 or 4 days of the work week, I have to have supper cooked by 4:30 at the latest, because of engagements either my husband has, our the both of us... so I really need to utilize my crock pot more this year! Last year, sad to say,we ate way too much fast food because I wasn't able to manage the time the way I needed to. Not only was that unhealthy, but expensive. My family deserves better! I'm determined to have home cooked meals in my home every school day this year and on Sundays! It's going to be a challenge, but I'm up for it.
My prayer is that this school year, our children keep their testimonies clean, and set an example as christian young people in an environment that desperately needs christian influence. Not just them, but we adults as well. So, I will be praying that God will use us this year, and I ask that you join me in praying this prayer!

Sick and BORED has its advantages!

Today is the second day that I have been at home sick, and I am absolutely about to go crazy. I have been miserable,cranky, and mean to tell the truth! (Just ask my husband :) And today, my youngest, Andy, is home with me. Right now it looks like he could possibly have strep, so I'm keeping a close eye on his symptoms.
Yesterday, I was here at the house alone for the majority of the day, and I had a lot of time to lay in the bed and do nothing :) So to make the most of my time, I caught up on some Bible reading, and did some devotions. Have you ever noticed that when you have a burden on your heart that you thought no one but God and yourself knew about, God decides that it would be good for you to make everything you read specifically about that burden? He knows just how to get us out of our rut and in my case, does it, sometimes before I can even ask Him for help. I'm going to share my burden just in case someone that reads this may be going through the same thing.
I had a pastors wife tell me once that you couldn't make friends with members of your church. And I remember my response, "Well where else am I going to find friends? My life is spent at church!" So in the back of my mind, everytime I felt myself getting close to someone, I would think: "So,Lord, how is this going to turn out bad?" My husband is a HUGE people person, and he seems to make friends with everyone he talks to. He's just that way. I'm not. But when I do, I find myself critiquing everything I said to them afterwards, wondering if something I might have said could have hindered my role in their life as their pastor's wife. Or when they don't talk to me as much the following Sunday as I thought they should, my mind immediately begins to question, "What have I done?" or "What did I say?" and I let these thoughts and questions consume me until I am miserable. I know that most times, it's the devil trying to get to me. But I really do want to please those around me. Thats when the Lord pricks at my heart and says to me,"But are you pleasing ME?"
This was part of my Bible reading :
1 Peter 2:9 But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvellous light:

1 Peter 2:10 Which in time past were not a people, but are now the people of God: which had not obtained mercy, but now have obtained mercy.

1 Peter 2:11 Dearly beloved, I beseech you as strangers and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts, which war against the soul;

And I realized that my desire to please and have friendship and perfect harmony with all of my sisters in Christ is a fleshly lust. It makes me happy, and eases my mind. But what does it do for me spiritually? Absulutely nothing. I realized that when something is said or done that makes me wonder if I did something to offend or upset, it changes my mood and my mindset and THAT does hinder me spiritually. Don't get me wrong please, I do want to have harmony with my sisters in Christ. And as long as I am serving and obeying God, and pleasing HIM, He will take care of the rest. I can't make everyone look at me with grace and love, but the Father can, if He sees fit to. So instead of letting my desire to please people cause war against my soul, I put it all in His very capable hands.
I still have so much to learn. I can tell you today much more than yesterday that I never knew how much was involved in the ministry. It overwhelms me at times, and that seems to be when I lean the hardest on my girlfriends. I know that it's my husband I should lean to, but my carnal mind whispers to me all the time, "You don't need to burden him with your feelings, he has so much on him without you adding to his load." So my prayer at the end of yesterday and the beginning of today is, "Lord, please help me to lean on YOU and confide in You. For YOU alone have all the answers I need, and you will never misunderstand me."
If you have experienced anything similar to this, as a PW, let me be the first to tell you that it's not easy to limit yourself in your relationships in the church, but when you put God first in your life, and support your husband in the way that God tells us to (and not society) then He will give you wisdom in everything you do. Just seek Him for advice.
I love every single lady in my church. And I will continue to fellowship with them in any way I can! But my closest companionship is reserved for two alone: My Saviour, and my husband.

"Thank You Lord, for being there for me when I get ahead of myself and forget that You alone have the answers that I need. All of my complaining or fears shared with another does nothing to lift them up spiritually, but when I come to YOU, you lovingly guard my footsteps,my heart, and my tongue. Only You can give the perfect advice. And You Know the way that is best for me. Help me Dear Lord to be the Pastor's Wife that You want me to be, to be the helpmeet to my husband that You want me to be and that he needs for me to be. And finally Lord, thank You, for allowing me the chance to serve You. In Jesus' name, Amen!"

*** Sometimes in our busy lives, getting sick is the only thing that makes us slow down. It's then that we take the time to reflect on things in our lives that maybe needs changing or a good "working on". I hope that sharing my heart's burden has helped someone else. Just remember that even though it feels lonely sometimes, and feels like you have been "deserted", God has called us to serve Him. He never promised the ministry would be easy, but it's full of spiritual fruit and blessings unimaginable. Just serve Him, make yourself available to Him, seek Him then let Him do the rest.